How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen Book by David Brooks

How to Know a Person by David Brooks is a guide to mastering the "lost art" of truly seeing and understanding others. Brooks argues that in an era of loneliness and polarization, the ability to make others feel valued and seen is a vital moral and social skill. The book presents a shift from being a "diminisher"—someone who stereotypes or ignores others—to being an "illuminator"—someone who has a persistent curiosity and makes people feel "lit up". Brooks draws from psychology, neuroscience, and personal stories to show that human connection is not just an instinct but a craft that can be learned.